Without a doubt, starting a conversation with your spouse about your sex life or the topic of sexual dysfunction will be one of the hardest conversations you will ever have.
These conversations should occur frequently throughout the course of married life but a lot of the time, our day to day pressures and routines stand in the way of timely and effective communication.
Set Your Time and Tone
There does not have to be a problem sexually to discuss your sex life. Schedule this important conversation.If there is a problem that needs to be addressed, plan your conversation accordingly.
Remember those dreaded speeches in school and the trepidation they caused? Prepare in advance, having clear points to discuss with your spouse about your own needs, as well as those of your partner.
Maintain Respect for Your Partner at All Times
Effective communication can not only solve festering issues, it can pinpoint the specific problems in the marriage and provide a path to move forward together without demeaning the opposite partner.
It is Okay to Agree To Disagree
Many people communicate by trying to pound their point of view in enough times that you agree with them. If you are having an honest conversation about sex, always be sure that each partner knows what the others boundaries are regarding sex in the relationship.
You can agree to disagree, but you both need to discuss options and find a solution to the problem at hand without being combative.
Explore All Resources Available
The key to solving any issue is to understand what options and what resources are available to assist you in solving your relationship problem.
According to the article, “5 Tips for Breaking the Sexual Rut and Enjoying a Better Sex Life” by Zoe O. Entin of marriage.com:
“It should also be acknowledged that some couples might hit an impasse when trying to find ways to tackle important issues (or even talk about them). This does not always indicate negative results but the process can be assisted if you seek out a couple's or sex therapist”.
Remember the Romance
Try to remember how you felt when your relationship was new and exciting, even if it was a long time ago. Go back to doing the things you used to and became complacent about. Sometimes, the simplest things can improve your communication and intimacy.